The best TV & Movies of 2014

Film / TV of 2014  11-12-14

Having listened to Jason Solomons list of the best movies of 2014 on Robert Elms always interesting show on BBC London 94.9FM today , I have thought about my favourites this year. Jason included" Nightcrawler" with Jake Gyllenhall as a creepy opportunist ambulance chasing newshound, which I thought was a terrific comment on modern day inter-personal communication and the news agenda. I currently think  "Welcome to New York" is my favourite release of the year; Abel Ferrara is back on top form, pushing back the taboo boundaries in a similar way to his 1992 success," Bad Lieutenant". The tale of the cop falling apart starred Harvey Keitel, taking crack and praying in a church having disrobed, created a media storm at the time. It is unlikely this time round seeing as the story of the notorious depravity of the high profile French politician whoring his way round NYC was barely seen in a UK cinema. Nor did it go straight to DVD; its fate was even worse; straight to stream online. That says it all to me about how we in the UK cannot cope with adult films about sex - as opposed to adult sex films - we can cope with them OK.

How different the times are now for Abel Ferrara, Dario Argento, David Cronenbourg as well as Harvey Keitel, Nick Cage and David Lynch. The careers of these cult figures tend to go through peaks and troughs; many of them have had their biggest success for aeons this year. Cronenbourgs "Maps to The Stars" was one of the best films about Hollywood I have ever seen, and is my favourite movie from across the pond (USA). Us Brits can take credit for many high points of the year including Mike Leigh's "Mr Turner" which got better and better as it went on, after a low key and clunky first half hour. Dario Argento has announced a new film of the Sandman comic legend with Iggy Pop as the eye-eating monster who haunts childrens' nightmares. Should be great, especially if Dario can persuade his daughter, Treedown Gotobed's favourite actress of modern times - Asia Argento - to take part.

Two biopics were similar in many ways including the rampant egotism of their main subject. "Finding Fela" was another DVD release that deserved better, especially as the man was such a megastar. Alex Gibney's documentary does not shy away from the awkward aspects of his story; the huge joints he would smoke on stage, the 27 wives he married in one ceremony, and his brutal, sexist bullying of women. Fela's unapologetic credo has the African husband always in charge, and always right.

His fantastic band - so tight they made Paul McCartney cry - left him after his control freakery got too much. As did James Browns Famous Flames, who upped and left after being fined for every mistake by the self proclaimed Godfather of Soul.

Starring Chadwick Boseman in a lively performance, The James Brown story "Get On Up"was entertaining and interesting, detailing his dirt poor childhood through to the swift rise to success and battles with the payola system that had a hold of the American music industry. Dan Akroyd plays the sage manager who takes him all the way to top of the R&B charts and often No 1 in the main Billboards charts as well. Both films excel on the music front which isn't surprising seeing as both artists were superlative geniuses.

But 2014 was another year ruled by the TV series. No more Breaking Bad - we had True Detective . My goodness, what a master of the charismatic alpha male Matthew McConnaughay has become. And even us Brits - so lagging behind in this arena - had our own product of equally top quality. Just as Finding Fela had me speaking in a Nigerian accent for the rest of the night,The Fall has used its Belfast location to great effect. Not so much the city itself, but the people, and that accent became deliciously alluring when Boss cop Gillian Anderson sent a simulacrum into the police cell to bump the beautiful male psychopath out of communication shut down. Dressed in Stella's signature outfit and with her long dark hair deliberately styled to mirror Paul Spector's preferred victim type, the young officer delivered news of being 'further arrested' in the most spine-tingling seductive manner ever seen in a British police station. The female superstar - all restrained authority, sexy silk shirts and pencil skirts, is backed up by an ultra-modern take on sexual relations between consenting adults irrespective of gender. As the male anti-hero Jamie Dornan delivers dollops of sex appeal and charisma to match any American heavyweight as they play out their cat and mouse psychological mind games. Top effort, and full marks writer/director Alan Cubitt and the BBC drama dept - can't wait for the next series in 2015.

Orion Mars mission

Mission to Mars - Id rather go to Neptune - 07-12-14

According to Bloomberg, the money NaSA need to send the Orion capsule to Mars are astonomical. And even if they get the $22billion they need for starters, Orion may not make it to Mars...

"The Orion space capsule that launched earlier today has been under development by NASA since the mid-2000s. But, watching it splash down in the Pacific ocean four hours later, you'd be forgiven for thinking of the 1970s. The capsule, which by some reliable estimates cost over $10 billion, didn’t accomplish anything that wasn’t somewhat routine for NASA in the era of the Apollo moon landings.NASA, however, is encouraging a very different view.  Rather than admit Orion's many shortcomings, it has boldly  promoted the mission as the first step in America’s journey to Mars -- or, as NASA tweets it, America's #JourneyToMars

It's laudable, of course, that a perpetually under-funded government agency -- one that hasn’t sent a crewed mission beyond low-Earth orbit in forty-two years -- is able to muster this sort of long-term optimism. But optimism alone won’t send a jumbo-sized space capsule to Mars. You need money, and lots of it: a recent National Research Council study looked at several mission pathways to Mars, including Orion, and saw no possibility that any mission could be accomplished for less than hundreds of billions of dollars. In contrast, the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) expects to spend $22 billion on Orion and the Space Launch System rocket by 2021 (according to the Government Accountability Office, a true accounting of Orion’s costs has not been provided by NASA). There's no reason to believe that greater volumes of money will ever materialize.  NASA, in other words, intends on spending vast sums of money on a Mars capsule that will not be going to Mars."

A trip to Mars would mean missing 10 Victorias Secret shows - minimum

Now this may not be such a bad thing after all. Lets take a look at what we know about Mars. Theres not a whole lot going on there. In fact, fuck all goes on there. You might as well send the astronauts to the Sahara for a year or two and save them the discomfort and danger of the take-off, the 2 year journey, and the touch down. Even if there is no touch down, and they just bypass Mars and carry on to someplace else, and frankly who could blame them,they still need to bring Orion back home at some time hence.

If anyone thought for one second that Martians were going to materilise I'd be all for it. Never mind Martians, if anyone thought the tiniest worm might crawl out of the red sandy surface, it might justify a few dollars to go there. Then we could all say - "hurrah, its ET !"

But even that seems a forlorn hope. So NASA is going to send those privileged sops to the most boring planet ever discovered. Id rather they went to Planet Hollywood and ordered 50million burger and fries for the undernourished Africans who need a good meal. Go to to see Spurs play, go to the jungle and bring national treasure Carl Fogarty back to Bolton, Go to Russia and call Putin a pansy...you never know what might happen.

But going to Mars is a round trip to nowhere useful, entertaining and not worth terraforming. Go the other way NASA, arent Neptunes moons worth a quick(ish) trip?

Adam and The Ants - Islington Assembly Hall 14-12-14

Adam and The Ants – Islington Assembly Halls 23-11-14

There was something unique about the atmosphere at the Assembly Halls on Adam And the Ants final night of four sell out dates in Islington. The crowd consisted of rock’n roll people dressed up in their highest heels, best hats, Cramps emblazoned leather jackets, and of course lots of DIRK WEARS WHITE SOX T-shirts, the like I haven’t seen for many years.
When the young band launched into Cartrouble and Adam Ant began by asking that question " Have you ever had a ride in a light blue car ?" - it all got too much for me and I launched myself into a pogo along with a few others that we sustained for the entire number . Wow – I didn’t know my legs still had the bounce in them.
The entire first LP was run through, then we had a rest period when Adam and band sat down and played some new songs on acoustic guitars. When a second drummer appeared in white goth haircut not seen since the last night at the Batcave, my excitement levels began to reclimb.
Sure enough there followed the cool hits – Dog Eat Dog, Xerox and a magnificent version of Kings Of the Wild Frontier. I think we all felt like “We are Family” by the end. Adam remains a charismatic front man and still retains a great rock voice.
We hung about talking for so long outside afterwards, I had to run up Upper St to get the last train home. Now there’s another thing I haven’t done for many years!

Toast + Bad Behaviour 2014

Toast of London and Bad Behaviour 2014 at Brixton East 20-11-14

Araba Ocran has put together a varied and enjoyable show at that fantastic new space in South London's heartland- Brixton East. The opening was packed and Im afraid some of the pieces positioned in the middle of the ground floor came a cropper.
"Hey dude , so good to see you " said one perfectly sober attendee. As he made his way through the crowd a fabulous pair of concrete socks that doubled as candles got knocked over. The poor chap looked mortified, but the socks had survived and looked fine when i returned to the spot later.

One of the best pieces was being projected onto the wall opposite outside. Kevin Tillett describes himself as a laser artist, and his 45 minute long loop of words and shapes was superb.
Inside Madeleine ross told me about her bronze light which she had bashed and worked into shape on a sturdy plinth. Plenty of sweat and tears had gone into it, and it was attracting attention - deservedly.
On the ground floor, the next generation art work of robot wars was unavoidable as it moved towards you like a triffid on the march. Lots of fun and well worked too.

My absolute favourite piece was by Ruth Murray. This was fabulous - lovely detail, a great idea of a family making a person out of spam , and delightful, delicate colours.
Get there before Sunday.

http://www.bbehaviour.com/exhibitions/1-bad-behaviour

Toast of London 

Is there anything better in life than an uncontrolled belly laugh. Matt Berry in Toast of London touched every one of my funny bones the other night in Episode 2 of the new series. "Desperate Measures" had the nasty, foul mouthed, bad tempered , child unfriendly Toast trying to direct an am-dram version of Calendar Girls, as well as appearing in Blue Peter while smoking a fag, and having been in a plane crash, threatened with the worst fate for ex-actors , poaching rabbits with Nettles (John). Advertising Red Carpet cigarettes for the Congolese market is how it starts and ends. Beuatifully crafted and written, it stars all sorts of great character actors including Doon Mclaghlin as his agent. The other episodes have been great fun too - a blow football match for high stakes with his arch nemesis, and then the first actor to tell whodunnit in the Moosetrap.  Set the Sky box to record


series.

The Ghosts of Main st - 14-11-14

The Ghosts of Main St - 10-11-14

The outcry of woe that followed the Hollaback campaign video of an actress being shouted and leered at by New York men has made most New Yorkers feel embarrassed. How can the world’s most progressive city be so packed full of Neanderthal men? Where is all this shouting going to get them? Not into her good books, that's for sure. So why do it?

All women learn how to deal with the male gaze in their teens. As soon as those boobs arrive men of all ages start to take notice. You are on the radar - an eye-magnet. You best be ready girl. Every time you step out of the door with a bit of slap and decent fitting clothes on, men are going to notice you. The white van men, the taxi drivers, the drivers generally, the motorcyclists, the shop workers, the pedestrians, the others in your vicinity. They notice. What they do depends a lot on them, but also on you, how you look, how you react. The tom cat calling is just trying to provoke a reaction because they themselves feel invisible; they are the ghosts of the High St. "Hey girl, I'm here. Look at me!" It's generally nothing more.

Would the same amount of catcalling happen in London? Or Paris, or any other world capital? No, because the American male is loud & self confident. The London male is a down-trodden, confused person. He has got no idea what he's meant to do or say. All he knows is he is a pathetic, down-trodden and confused person.

Just look at the current output of UK based culture - the films, the art, the fashion, the music. Women are in charge - make no mistake. Notable recent contemporary major art shows have been by women; Sarah Lucas - an endless pee take and power play over the male sex - right down to the Sunday Sport cuttings on the wall of a dwarf sexpot, boasting of her conquest(s). Tracey Emin, another big show with the list of 'conquests' in her tent of glory. What have the men come up with? Judging by the Turner prize, that emblem of the new, the best next gen artists...pitifully little. Three men have each been chosen for video installations of the most mind-numbing tedium you wonder if they should bother giving the prize at all. Two of the men seem obsessed with gynecological pictures and clinical, emotionless examinations of genitalia.

The prize is bound to go to the one female who has bothered to add some colour and life to the room, Ciara Phillips. In the others spaces you have to go into a darkened room. The spectator exists in the shadows, as if to be looking at the material is shameful and one wouldn't want anyone to know you are there. And then you scuttle out, sullied and degraded by these male artists' adolescent preoccupations. And even the two pervs are better than the pure pretention of the third man, Duncan Campbell. His Chris Marker / Alan Resnais tribute ‘It for Others’ is possibly the worst art "piece" I have ever beheld.

That includes Gilbert & George bending over and holding their Y-Fronts apart so we can get a good view of their hideous rear parts...all surrounded by the materials these parts produce. To be worse than that is some achievement. Everything about it made me want to commit violent destruction on my surrounds. Seeing as I was in Tate Britain – one of my most beloved places on earth – again this was going some Duncan. Well done! If you want a personification of UK man 2014 – Duncan maybe it. Pathetic, confused, weedy and so pretentious it makes you feel ill.

Then look at the British male offered to us in films - what do we get? Yet another costume drama in Mr Turner - Tim Spall huffing and snorting whether he is in pursuit of a sunset or a tortured sleazy coupling. And The Imitation Game - more shame. One of the best, most truly adult and thus challenging films dealing with sex is Steve Mcqueen's Shame but I dont think you could say it's British - so firmly does it reside in that 24hr city where we started - NYC. Do you get my point – UK man right now is not a proud confident person, is he?

Hang on a minute - wahtabout Tom Hardy - star of every second of Locke- the film that makes a tense situation out of a man driving a car while trying to organise a mega-conctrete pour. Tom Hardy is the embodiment of the British Alpha male in 2014. If they were casting James Bond now, Daniel Craig - theres another tough nut - would be out, Tom Hardy would be in. so we are not all having a crisis of confidence in the Englishmens b(l)ogs. Its just that most of us are.

The French on the other hand display that incredible confidence when portraying sex in films like 'Welcome To New York', 'Blue is the Warmest Colour' and the not one but two part 'Nymphomania'. None are directed by Frenchmen but it's the fact French money has got them made in French that is significant. It's a permanent wonder to me that I can go to my local library and get these movies out on DVD - how fantastic. They all contain sex scenes which would have been cut in the 70s - think Last Tango and the fuss about the butter scene for example. All three of the above contain far worse, more graphic scenes, as does that Cannes lauded but woeful nonsense Holy Motors by Leos Caraix.

In fashion - why are men put into skin tight shorts and long socks nowadays. It's yet another attempt to desexualise, demachismo the male on the street. At least on the catwalk! Music - it's all women - FKA Twigs, Lorde, Lykke Li, Lana Del Rey...who are the top men dogs...err Plan B ? Professor Green (no)? Actually Plan Bs movie ‘Ill Manors‘about life on the East End streets was fantastic , but sexy it is not, and the women lead dreadful, bullied and abused lives.

But there are worse places to live than Bethnal Green for girls. We could move to Saudi, and not be allowed to drive! We could go to Japan, and behave like little girls or be ostracized from the family. We could go to Pakistan and have our marriages arranged for us at 14 by our 74 year old grandfather. Go anywhere in the third world and you will be a 2^nd class citizen. Or one can revel in one’s sexiness here in Europe. Maybe we get approached by men – sometimes often. Yep, life is tough girls. We put our noses in the air and walk on, we judge the wretch because his clothes are not good enough. We can blank them and move on in the pub, the cafe, the street. If women were nicer to men when they get the courage up to approach them, you wouldn’t find this vengeful tone on the streets . How would you feel girl, if you went up to some guy you thought was dishy and he just turned his back on you, like you were a piece of dirt. It does not feel good, believe me .

So what about those mofos who follow you for ages, won't go away. That kind of stalker-like behaviour is what gives the male sex a bad name. What can be done about them? Dk. Lock em up, pepper spray them, what do you suggest. Deliberate intimidation is not on, ever. Threatening to rape the actress on Twitter? You are a revolting bully...just do one.

There is one fate that awaits the eye-magnets - the supermodels of your peer group - even more horrible than ending up with John McCririck as your beau. It happens to us all. You become a ghost of the high street as well. In your forties the creeping feeling of the ghost pulling at your skin, loosening where it used to be tight, blobs where it was smooth, takes over until no matter what you do, what sky-high heels and figure hugging dresses you don, what haircut you have, you are just not there anymore. Like Bewitched – a wiggle of the nose, a swish of the tale, snap – you are gone! You have become the invisible ghost of Main St.

Then you will feel like shouting at them - "Hey boy - look at me - I'm here on your sidewalk! Now how about a wolf whistle?"

Pete / Petra Budgie for Treedown Gotobed blogspot

Mexican Day of the Dead Festival at The Bargehouse SE1 - 29-10-14

Day of the Dead Festival - The Bargehouse SE1 - 29-10-14

The opening night at the Bargehouse was one of those events where you wish you had dusted down the Paul Smith suit and the Prince style platforms for men, packed as it was with Amazonians that towered over you, even when stood on a sneaky step. One of the attendees must have been 6ft 6ins without the heels.
Many Mexican embassy staff marshalled us with grace,and the whole event was totally brilliant.
A room of b/w photos of WW1 veterans was a touching opening space. Onward and upward to floor 2 and floor 3 where the action was.

Fabulous HD photos of proper Mexican Day of the Dead costumes;the subjects covered in bright yellows and oranges, greens and blues, material, body paint and heaven knows what else. The triangular pieces along a wall were stunning in their beauty, and then there was a macabre room of wood like sculptures by the Chapman bros.

The floor ended with the geodesic dome constructed by Kayle Brandon and Lady Lucy, which will be covered with drawings and art works by attendees at the drawing exchange events at various cemeteries in the next 3 days. These include the Crossbones cemetery at Bunhill - no doubt linked to the famous plague pit, and Highgate East cemetary where Karl Marx is buried. The dome will be spectacular by Sunday, and I expect to be there to see it dismantled.
A totally brilliant night was capped by one of those moments of serendipidity you might be able to dine out on, (well at least get a swiss roll out of). I was explaining I loved London because there is always something of interest to be seen around every corner.

My friend was struggling with my concept, but just then we turned into Hatfields to see a large crowd gathered under a railway bridge, apparently all watching a huge row between a man and woman.
"Its one of those walking tours " I predicted.
As we approached all became clear. It was a promenade theatre event; the man had been attempting to leave his graffiti and tag and the woman had objected to him destroying the environment ( I think). There followed a full on, foul-mouthed slanging match with the arguments for and against the gentrification of London boroughs, delivered with brilliant clarity despite being yelled and featuring a foreign accent. It was amazing to stumble upon, especially at that moment and captured exactly the point I was trying to make about why I love this city.

www.dayofthedeadfestival.co.uk 

Late Turner + Turner Prize 2014 at Tate Britain

Late Turner & Turner Prize at Tate Britain 10-10-14

What would Turner make of this years prize, a decent enough question seeing as its named after him. We currently have an opportunity to imagine his frame of mind in later life, by examining many large and bright oils and more petite watercolours in the current show. He certainly put in the hard yards , no flipping through books in a library or listening to audio tracks on a computer for him. Much of these late works are composed from hillsides and lake views in Switzerland, with a familiar view of Lake Lucerne with its causeway over which trains still cross today. Then there is Lake Zug and and the famous mountain of the area – the Rilke I believe. He went back to this part of the world ten times and produced lots of work, some of which looks unfinished as the canvasses feature large white expanses – unusual for him.

Turner ended his career specialising in capturing a moment – that special moment when the sun bursts through the clouds like a celestial spotlight, blinding the onlooker with light. Or that millisecond when a steam train thunders across a viaduct, creating a foggy smokey atmosphere, through which one can not only glimpse the locomotive, but seemingly see inside the engine room, all sparks, sweat, motion, fury. He might be leaping what is really possible in this most famous picture ; "Rain, Steam, Speed - The Great Western Railway 1844", but most of us tend to overlook the artistic licence to allow for the overall effect. Atmosphere became his speciality and some of his best work can be seen in the Tate’s current show. There are some delightful views of Rome , ancient and modern, as well as fires as seen at the Houses of Parliament 1833 and at The Tower of London.

How do you create mystery and atmosphere when your chosen medium is video? Its not something any three of the four artists short listed for this years Turner prize attempt. They all seem to have reached the same point of view regarding art ; make a super annoying – ( Richards, Vonna, Campbell)} ultra pretentious – the one based on Chris Marker and Alan Resnais – “It for others” – Campbell , and extremely offensive and boundary pushing – Richards film featuring Robert Mapplethorpes xxx cert photos of male on male sex. All three are beyond any kind of excuse for art – they are accompanied by the most tedious, pathetic audio tracks imaginable – the only feeling any of them left me with was frustration that this utter drivel has been chosen not only for the Turner Prize, but to represent Britain at the Venice Biennale.What a bunch of utter, self important twerps the Italians who saw it must think we Brits are.

Whats worse is that the only artist the “panel” could find that didnt contribute a daft film was Ciara Philips screen prints which have been used to wallpaper her space. The only good thing here were her posters of revolutionaries like Riviera and Che Guevera. Really decent subject matter and didn’t make you feel like self harming within two minutes of looking on. Well that’s got to be worth £20k in itself, hasn’t it ?

For what its worth I think Duncan Campbell will win, as his was the only room that people didn’t rush through while averting their eyes from the art they were here to see. In Campbells room about half a dozen people were actually watching the film, without shouting out “when’s Emmanuelle on? “ or “I was expecting to see Saw or at least Machete ! “ or “boo I want my money back “ or the funniest “even Gilbert & George is better than this !”.But this was the most execrable, pretentious work I have seen in a long time. Truly dire. Congrats Duncan!