Free museums

The state of London's museums #1 Imperial War Museum - 29-02-16

I am disappointed with the refurbished Imperial War Museum. There seems to be a worrying trend of dumbing down museums, the new part of the National Maritime Museum in Greenwich is similar. Low in detail, big on interactive features and large print in the information cards and text based displays. OK, people dont want to read reams of print, but there is a tricky balance that curators have to deal with. The worst thing possible is to talk down to your visitors, as if they are all children with zero knowledge of the subject matter. The IWM has been stripped of many exhibits, I especially missed the basement labyrinth of displays regarding WW2. Its pretty much all gone. There is less of everything, except space. The Lee Miller exhibition is a delight, but it ends soon - the permanent displays are disappointing. Having said that, its great its still free. Here's hoping it, and many of London's great museums, remain so.

We Talk - London English conversation
Proposed new group will meet every week at different museums and galleries that are free to enter.
We will take a walk around for 45 minutes or so, and then have a drink and conversation in English.
Everyone is welcome, as long as you can converse in English and are open minded.
You must be able to discuss matters with people who think differently to you.
Politics and religion are banned as subjects for discussion.
Groups will be led by native English speakers who are well educated and may be teachers

get in touch via pbudgie12@gmail.com if you want to get involved

Men - How to judge their age

How to judge a middle aged man's age - 7-02-16

How old are these men, or a better question, what year were they born? No idea? Then look for the following clues in their conversation...

There are a few give aways i would suggest those who trawl Tinder, or suspect a man is being economic with the truth when he says he's 39, should look out for. Football, books, travel, TV and comedy. Heres how it works...

Football - dont switch off when a man starts to talk soccer - it can give you loads of info.
World Cup - If he remembers England winning the World Cup, he is at least 55. The great day for our nation was in 1966, so i think the age of 5 is a reasonable time to say "yes i remember it ". If he fought in the war, that was 1945, he is in his 90s, at least.
Chelsea - CFC won the FA cup in 1970. Many Chelsea fans started supporting them in that year , so if this is mentioned they are well into their 50s.
Arsenal - Gooners glory years were just after the CFC v Leeds final. In 1971 they triumphed over Liverpool 2-1 in what was probably the best final of the glory years, although Sunderland supporters would dispute the point. Charlie George , a most old fashioned type of smoking and drinking professional, scored the Arsenal winner with a shot from outside the box and lay on his back to celebrate. That team had the mothers favourite and TV pundit Bob Wilson in goal. Similar age group - in their 50s.
West Ham - only won stuff in the 60s , most fans who were there are 60 +.
Spurs - Tottenham havent won anything for years, if the chap starts saying he was there when spurs won the Cup in 81, 91, etc, dont believe a word he says, he's a bullshitter.

Books - this is a tough one and the following generalisations aren't necessarily true, so pinch of salt etc...
George Orwell, Graham Greene, John Fowles, Carlos Castaneda, F Scott Fitzgerald, Evelyn Waugh, Hunter S Thompson. It strikes me these writers have fallen out of fashion. In the 60s and 70s everyone at least read Orwell, even if they didnt love him. Any English A Level student would be able to talk about Animal Farm and 1984. Greenes Brighton Rock was another novel everyone had read. The rest of the list was not so de rigeur, but Fowles and Castaneda are fairly hippy type writers, so if they are mentioned, your companion is nearing 60, at least. Waugh was old fashioned by the 70s, but Hunter S Thompson was the coolest writer of the time. Everybody's favourite book was Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Fans of this are probably 50 +.

Travel - it was different in the 70s. People used to hitch-hike.A phrase like "we hitched all over Europe following The Ramones" isnt as preposterous as it may sound. Similarly;"we hitched across Europe and met in The Pudding Shop" was commonly heard until Midnight Express came out and no westerner went to turkey for the next 20 years.People also went to Goa, especially in the hippy era. If the person you are examining has hippy tendencies, likes Bob Dylan and goes misty eyed at a whiff of patchouli, they were probably born in 1950, making them 66. the punk era had a saying - never trust a hippy. If the man saw the Sex Pistols gig at Central St Martins, or The Clash tour in 1977, they would have been at least 15, making them mid 50s now. The Iron Curtain existed until 1989, as did Checkpoint Charlie. Anyone who went to East Berlin is not only interesting and worth talking to, they are not necessarily old.

TV - children's TV is one of the best ways to judge someones age. In the 60s, French programmes dubbed into English ruled. Belle & Sebastian, White Horses - great theme tune btw - Flashing Blade, were all super cool among 4 year olds in the 60s. If these make for misty eyed memories, you are looking at someone in their 50s. Animal Magic, Daktari, Banana Splits, Jackanory, Tiswas, Blue Peter all had followers. The hards in the playground only liked Tiswas because there was something about Sally James they liked, they just couldnt articulate what it was.

Comedy - the best indicator - The Goons & Hancocks Half Hour appealed to those born in 1950. Prince Charles' age group. Monty Python was a 70s show, so fans were born in 1960 or after. The Two Ronnies and Morecombe & Wise were big in the 70s, so again, appealled to those in their 50s now. Rick Mayall, Ben elton and The Young Ones crew came later, so now we are probably talking to a 40 year old. The Inbetweeners is strictly for teenagers, so youve landed someone who's never grown up and expect a selfish adolescent in the behaviour department.

Physical Appearance - hair gives you no clues. Hands maybe, teeth are a possible, but its easy to look young nowadays. You cant fake your memories though.

If said individual fails to mention any of the above, it means one of two things. Either he really is as young as he claims to be, or he was brought up abroad.

David Bowie - all the young dudes will always be trying to catch up

David Bowie - Superstar 07-01-16

Ever since I was 9, and the cocky red haired dude with a blue guitar sang about Starman on TOTP, David Bowie has been there in my consciousness. He embodied all that was new, cool, clever and different. Even after Let's Dance and his straight, money making years that followed the incredible 70s, a decade of untold creativity, he was still top of the pile. The number 1 dude. Mott the Hoople got lucky the day David gave them the song. As did so many
thers who benefited from his generosity of intellect. Iggy Pop, Lou Reed & Lulu, Reeves Gabriel, Earl Slick, Carlos Alomar and Brian Eno, Queen, Luther Vandross, Rick Wakeman, Tony Visconti. Do you see ? It's always the collaborator who benefits from working with Bowie, in reputation and financially.

No-one got more from David than Iggy. He was the washed up singer everybody in the music business avoided when David visited New York and found him in a mess. There was so much more to David Bowie than everyone else. A genius isn't just ahead of the rest, he creates what they've never even thought of. Other people's opinions are of no interest, the genius knows what he likes and what he values. Like Lou Reed, Bowie saw past the the drug habit to the talent that just needed help to be unleashed. Raw Power was the first output of the collaboration. But who could have ever predicted a record as innovative as The Idiot was in Iggy, as well as the amazing energy of Lust for Life, released on RCA - David's record label - just a few years after a sojourn in Berlin together. Watching them being interviewed on American TV by some middle aged ladies is a great joy, as is Iggy's performance of Funtime and Sister Midnight, with David on keyboards, backing vocals and a caring eye on the singer.

Another great joy to be found on YouTube is the Young Americans performance with Luther Vandross leading the super hard working backing singers. The second song performed is called Footstomping, which metamorphises into Fame by the time the LP is released, Bowie having spent a recording session with John Lennon. What a bizarre volte face this soul album seemed when released, following those three rock LPs that established him as a star; Ziggy Stardust, Aladdin Sane and Diamond Dogs. Us teenage boys hated it ! But now its my favourite LP. Same goes with Low and Heroes, those super masterpieces that were so far ahead of their time, most of us were just confused by them. Now the side 2s are my favourite ambient albums ever !

He gave us so much, the top 100 books list he did was fabulously eclectic, intellectual, arty and confusing. Like him, so far ahead us followers take years to catch up! Thank you David - from all Iggy, Lou and Eno fans .

Top Ten Bowie tracks
Golden years
Fascination,
Lady Grinning Soul / Aladdin Sane
Subterraneans
Warsawa
Ashes to Ashes
John I'm Only Dancing
Be My Wife
Changes
Queen Bitch

The Revenant - put your house on it winning Oscars

The Oscars 2016 - nothing can get close to The Revenant

They will need a supermarket trolley to cart them off to the afterparty

The Revenant is bound to sweep up awards at this year's Oscar ceremony. I really cannot see anyone beating Leo DiCaprio for best actor or director Alejandro Inarritu - already a Hollywood golden boy with Birdman, Biutiful, Babel and Amoros Perros in his cv. This movie grips you by the throat from minute 1 and rarely lets the pressure off the choke hold of tension and fear created by a brutal, merciless Native Indian attack on the white men gathering animal skins for profit in the wonderful, developing opening scene. The viewer's heart rate may be driven to critical levels when our hero makes the (near) fatal error of getting between a grizzly bear and its cub. This scene is a wonder of modern film making and new technology. The enormous grizzly has Leo in its claws and teeth and treats him like a rag doll. When the huge head investigates the tiny human's face you cannot believe this is not a real interaction and anything - probably gory - may happen next.

The suffering just goes from bad to dire in the new Frontier for the mainman,Hugh Glass played by DiCaprio. He even gets a hole in his throat which he self-cauterizes by lighting gun powder and burning straw directly onto it. The agonies go on and on. Needless to say the Native Americans (Red Indians in the old days) are merciless scalpers of most white men, although the French seem to have a better dialogue - go figure. Innaritu excels with his epic shots of snow capped mountains, icy rivers, rapids and waterfalls, and the wildlife as I have mentioned is superb. With a fabulously nasty performance by Tom Hardy as best support - bet on it - and Domhall Gleeson also excelling as the honourable soldier in charge of the American forces, Will Poulter also does good work in adverse conditions, The Revenant should be seen at the best screen you can find it at. The top 3 Oscars are odds on already won, best female it will not win; there are not many women in this one.

Cy Twombly - at Gagosian Gallery W1 - 29-11-15

Cy Twombly - at new Gagosian Gallery, Grosvener Hill W1

When you walk through the windswept streets of Soho and Mayfair, around Golden Square from Brewer St, across Regent Street all lit up with Christmas lights and half empty of the rich and lazy moneyed masses of the continent, do you feel sorry for the empty shopkeepers of  Diane Von Furstenburg, Vivienne Westwood, Chanel and Swarovski ?

Do you feel sorry for the smart guards, ready to anoint the chosen with largesse, & open the shop doors as if you look worthy of the honour?
 Do you think it will be a good Xmas ?

If you were given a Bafta or an Oscar, would you walk up on stage, accept your award, wait for the applause to die, and then with mock humility, say;

"To all the teachers, advisers, parents and believers, to all the hundreds who have helped me get here, to all those who didn't sack me or forget me, or ignore an e mail or text I sent asking for a favour, to all you generous people, I just want to say, fuck you very much".
If you battle through the crowds on a cold, rain soaked London day and finally navigate your way to the new Gagosian temple of art, that is the message you will receive from Cy.
"Fuck you all, I vomit on art !"

A Cy Twombly squiggle on a blackboard recently sold for $77m.
Mr Billionaire, what is there here? Two pieces of red paint scrawled (pictured) entitled Bacchus. There are also round squiggles in purple on huge canvas, and another canvas with three wobbly lines scrawled as if the artist was on his deathbed and tried to paint with the wrong hand, while holding a long stick with a brush on its end. The beauty of Pissaro's landscapes and Parisian boulevards, Monet's water lilles, Manet's Olympia or his Bar Girl at the Moulin Rouge, Degas at the ballet, Picasso's whole oeuvre, all Matisse, Dufy's scenes of the Baie Des Anges, Bacon's depictions of madness, Freud and his brutal nudes, Oldenburg, Jeff Koons and Banksy's gifts to our land and city scapes.
Forget them all Mr £1bn- Cy gives you empty, pointless scrawl for your millions. by buying this ,you are actively giving a V sign to all the beauty produced by these others. You dont give a f. So long as makes you money, the rest dont matter ...right?

Arts round up October 2015

Arts round up Oct 2015

Why has so little been said this autumn by this (post) august body of thinkers ? We dont spend all our time in bed - honest.

Well, there has been so little to enthuse about. The art shows Ive been to have been lamentable. Frank Auerbach is the greatest living British artist Waldemar Januszach told us in the Sunday Times. Really? Is that all we are left with in this post Freud and Bacon age? How about Hockney? Goldsworthy? Hurst and the other YBAs still creating. Mat Collishaw, Jeremy Dellar, how about Banksy? I didn't make it to Dismaland- Banksys super art theme park in Weston-Super-Mare, but everything I heard was positive and generous. He really is the real deal, not interested in fame and fortune, you never see him in his artistic output. Sarah Lucas take note ; maybe you arent as interesting and your weedy attempts to embarrass men are just feeble and pathetic, not oh so clever like I think you want us to think.
Auerbach at the Tate - so disappointing. Theres not one piece Id really want to own and cherish. What a paucity of ideas. What shall I paint today?
Lessee...oh, the view from the studio in Mornington Crescent ! What, again? Yes , again! If its good enough for Monet, its good enough for me. Plus I cant think of anything else. The early years included a piece that was so thickly plastered with paint, it was a wonder it hadnt all dripped in a long spaghetti like dollop. From afar this one of three figures in a garden was actually quite mesmerising, it has a ghostly quality that amazed me. So I am being harsh, but the later, badly mixed and roughly applied lines that were the "To the studio" series were just boring and low in quality.

The other show at the Tate Modern was  The World Goes Pop. Having paid - well if i wasnt a member - £15 or more, I wouldn't have been happy to see room after room of distinctly 2nd rate efforts by artists from around the world I had never heard of. Where were the Lichtensteins and Warhols I asked? "The idea wasn't to show the famous Americans, but show how Pop was created by artists from other parts of the globe" I was told at the info desk. Well OK, fine. But dont charge mega bucks as if the place was packed with dollar bills, Marilyns and Elvises. It just struck me as disingenuous and not worthy of my favourite art institution.
The best entertainment has been provided by the fabulous BBC radio channels 4, 4extra and 3, yet again. The series of plays, essays and documentaries commemorating Arthur Miller's birth has been a real treat and education. I have heard Death of a Salesman and View From the Bridge with David Suchet and Zoe Wanamaker having a great time with some of the best writing of the post war era. Howard Pinter's The Caretaker with David Warner was equally gripping, but I could not get to the end and stopped listening at a apposite time. Now a minor winge - BBC iplayer is quite hard to navigate, and now I cant find it again !
TV - now the remarkable Shane Meadows series This is England has finished, there is little left. Narcos is great on Netflix, but Homeland really is getting  dafter and dafter. I have a feeling it will end up like Lost, flogging the dead horse while no-one is watching.

Angus McGill - one of the Fleet st old school

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